There have been times at work that I've lamented that I'm the worst mom in the world. Fortunately I have a friend who will remind me that my children are clothed, fed and clean so while I may not win mother of the year I'm certainly not the WORST mother in the world. Don't you just love good friends :)
Seriously though, I think most mothers question whether they are doing a good enough job for their kids. Have we prepared them well for the future? Are we shaping them to be self-sufficient adults that we would like whether we are related to them or not? Will they look back on their childhood with fondness and contenment or will they resent us for the opportunities they never received? As a working mother it gets even worse. Do mothers who quit their jobs to stay home love their kids more than I do? Is daycare going to scar my children forever? Is my kid going to resent forever that I missed the 3rd grade Christmas program because of a business trip? Need I go on?
As the mother of older children I'm starting to get a glimpse of who they will be in adulthood and I'm quite pleased with what I'm seeing so far. My 20 year old son (soon to be 21) is really growing into a wonderful man. He works hard (at least at work!), he's considerate to his elders, he watches over his sister and helps her fit in at work (yes - they do still bicker as well), he shares his feelings with me (at least some of them) and he can talk to me like an adult. Yes, I am liking what I see.
This past weekend was pretty busy for me. We had one barbecue to host and two to attend so there was A LOT of food to make. What's a mother to do but drag her son into the kitchen to help cook. My son was rolling the Lil Smokies for bacon wrapped weiners while I had a cake cooling and was making meatloaf for the freezer. As we worked together he was quite talkative (something about working together in the kitchen brings out the chattiness of my kids) about his dating situation, his favorite childhood memories, the 'fun' we had doing last minute school projects, etc. During the course of the converstation he says to me "Mom, you've set the bar quite high for my future wife".
What!? Did my ears deceive me? My child, the one that I have fretted over for 20+ years that I was a 'good enough' mother for him, actually said that his future wife would have a high hurdle to cross. Be still my heart, isn't that what every mom wants to hear? He went on to say what a great cook I was (have you seen my menu plan?) and how awesome my baking was.
My adult child has just shared with me what I great mom I am and how hard of a time his yet unknown wife will have living up to the standards that I've set. Maybe I'm not the worst mom in the world! I'm a Rock Star Mom!
Now I just have to navigate my young daughter through the teenage years to really be a success! I have a wonderful product to work with so I'm sure we'll come out the other end fine.
Note to my future daughter-in-law: Don't worry, my son will love you and think you are wonderful no matter how great of a cook/baker you are. Plus, if you want I'll share some of my secrets with you so don't worry about the bar that has been set :)
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