When it comes to music I have several guilty pleasures, one of which is Olivia Newton John. Does anyone out there remember Xanadu? One of my favorite movies from my teen years but I'm terrified to go back and re-watch it. I'm sure it's one of those things that are better in your memory than reality.
One of my favorite Olivia songs is Have You Never Been Mellow. I'm not sure if I'm the audience or the speaker as I feel like this song was especially written for me. Let me tell you, I'm anything but mellow and sometimes it catches up with me.
A few years ago I took the Strength Finders test, Achiever is my number two strength. Knowing that I scored high in Achiever explains a lot. According to Strength Finders, Achievers have a great deal of stamina and work hard, they must accomplish something every day to feel good about themselves. Sometimes having high Achiever is not a good thing. It drives me to set unrealistic expectations for myself and to never be satisfied with my accomplishments. I struggle to relax and enjoy life. I put myself last, not because I don't think I'm worth putting myself first but because I view the sea of unfinished work out there and cannot relax until it's complete. I am sometimes judgemental of people who don't have my need to achieve. Not very positive traits I'm afraid to admit
Here's what happens to me. I go full steam ahead for so long and then I hit the proverbial wall. After a full day of cooking and cleaning on Saturday (which started at 5am) I had a total breakdown. My poor husband really didn't know what hit him. Then on Sunday I started getting sick. Because I don't take good care of myself I tend to get hit hard when I catch the bug. I was down Sunday night, all day Monday and all day Tuesday. Didn't get anything accomplished, unless letting the dryer repair man in the door before collapsing on the couch counts as 'accomplishing' stuff.
I don't have the answer, but here's what I do know. Life is to short to work yourself to death. Hitting the wall and laying on the couch for two days doesn't do anyone any good. I need to find some kind of balance between my need to accomplish and my need to slow down.
It would help if we could afford to hire an Alice or a Mr. French. If only :)
Have You Never Been Mellow
There was a time when I was in a hurry as you are
I was like you
There was a day when I just had to tell my point of view
I was like you
Now I don't mean to make you frown
No, I just want you to slow down
Have you never been mellow?
Have you never tried to find a comfort from inside you?
Have you never been happy just to hear your song?
Have you never let someone else be strong?
Running around as you do with your head up in the clouds
I was like you
Never had time to lay back, kick your shoes off, close your eyes
I was like you
Now you're not hard to understand
You need someone to take your hand
How do you keep yourself mellow?
I'll be linking this up over at We are THAT Family
I am a lot like you! I have no foolproof secrets to managing better, but you might get some help from the Rule of One Thing and Three Things.
ReplyDeleteI have to say, when I get sick after a big binge of accomplishment, there's kind of a mixed message: Yeah, if I hadn't overdone, I might not have gotten sick...but given that I am sick, isn't it great that all that stuff is done so that things are running smoothly for a while and I don't feel like I ought to be working while sick?! It's a million times worse when I get sick with a lot of stuff undone and then I feel both sick and guilty for not working harder before.
Mellow? I'm supposed to be mellow sometimes? Sheesh, news to me!!! Lol
ReplyDeleteSpending time with my family is usually my 'mellow' time. Just running around doing errands, going to a local farmer's market, going camping, geocaching. Those are relaxing times for me.
I too run at 100 mph, but I also try to be 'in the moment' when I'm with my family. I have an almost 21 year old, 17 yr old & an 11 yr old. When my oldest left home, I realized that I only have THIS time with them (which we did take before he moved out too). Soon another will be gone & not long after our 'baby'. The only advice I can give, is when you have time & you're together (or crafting or reading or whatever it is you do to relax), truly, truly, truly be IN that time... enjoy it.
I always feel like a Yoyo! I try to get a bunch of stuff done but I get frustrated and hit a wall quickly. Exercise, in my case, dance helps center me. I am also a daydreamer so I tend to "zone out" a lot and fall into my own little fantasies. Organizing something helps as well. Or reading blogs!
ReplyDeleteHaley @thedistractedblogger